I have been really struggling this week with the act of balancing my work and my family. Many of you who know me personally, know that I spent 8 years home with my children. I was a mom, chef, maid, teacher, chauffer, nurse, doctor, playmate, disciplinarian, and so much more. I was a homeschooler, mentor, an author, a friend, a confidant, an event planner, and more. I was a wife, helpmate, business partner, secretary, accountant, and more. My life and world centered around my family and what I could do to make their lives better.
Then one day my world seemed to turn upside down. It started with the words ovarian cancer but I figured with my family by my side I could overcome any obstacle. And I did. Then I heard, we are taking your husband to the hospital. It looks bad and it was... in more way than one. That was the beginning of the end. I was traded in for a newer model and suddenly I was no longer a wife and mother. I was now the sole provider with 3 boys looking to me to keep their lives in order and somewhat constant with what they were used to. I gave up on my degree to be a mom. How was I to provide for them?? As always, God provided the answers and my children haven't really lost all that much considering all that there was to lose.
Fast forward to this week, my littlest one curled up on the ottoman wrapped in a blanket asking why can't you just be my mom again. Those sweet little words were heart wrenching. Oh how I wish I could do just that but I kissed him on the head and promised we will have a mommy day soon and headed out for work. That night when I got home, the boys were miserable. Nothing went right and I spent hours rocking and reassuring my boys that life was okay. That there was still someone to love them even if I wasn't home all the time. I went to bed that night in tears.
I woke up that morning in tears as well. I got up and was determined to put on a brave face and continue on with my routine as that was what was best for the kids. A very special someone gave me a bit of wisdom that morning. He stated that it was infinetely more important for me to stay home with the boys that day than go to work. Money would work itself out later this is something that must be done. He was more right than he realizes. I feel so rejuvenated and the kids laughed and giggled all day. We didn't do anything particular just enjoyed being a family at home.
Another friend sent me this link: http://www.cmu.edu/randyslecture/ His advice... that no parent should miss out on this lecture. I would have to say I agree with his sentiments. However, I would state that there are lessons to be learned by all from this video. I think my kids should watch it as well. This is the link that will take you directly to the video by Professor Randy Pausch: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ji5_MqicxSo Its long. I won't lie to you but if you have to skip some parts start about 45 minutes into the lecture. He will start wrapping up his life lessons. Its one of the most touching things I have seen in awhile.
For those of you who are single and dating like me, I have a piece of advice I learned from this about men. Ignore their words and watch their actions. Men are doers not talkers. Their actions will tell you all that you need to know. At first, I thought this isn't true but then I thought about it and you know what.... it is 100% true. I wish I knew this a long time ago.
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